


Coping

by Nopholom



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Anal Sex, Angst Dean Winchester, Blow Jobs, Foursome - M/M/M/M, Frottage, Light Bondage (mentions), M/M, Polyamory, Polygamy, Rimming, Sibling Incest, Wincest - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-28
Updated: 2012-09-28
Packaged: 2017-11-15 04:31:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/523174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nopholom/pseuds/Nopholom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Dean agreed to this relationship, he'd thought it would be easy to remain uncompromised by taboo feelings, hell he didn't think there was a chance it'd even come to that, but out of the four of them? He was the only one stupid enough to think as much.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Coping

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry if you're waiting for me to update BNooS, I'll get on that soon, blame Dreadelion for this one, my first foray into Wincest (It's not my ship, I just had the idea and liked the concept, but who knows what time will bring?)
> 
> I start Uni on Monday so things might be slow going. I already have a fucking universe set out for this oneshot and I've only had it for a day. SIGH.
> 
> Also small note: Redwood refers to where they live, it's mid way between the two Universities, and I'm blagging the rest of the locations aside from that knowledge.

Dean had to admit, if there was one thing he loved about this weird little arrangement he had with his housemates, it was watching his boyfriend trying to fuck Gabriel’s mouth with his tongue. He was hard as hell just watching them touch each other, kneeling on the other couch and groping as they kissed, if you could even call it a kiss, it was messy and needy and looked more like an act of aggression than anything else. He couldn’t help but palm at himself through his boxers, stroking up the line of his prick and letting out a relieved breath, the contact felt long overdue. He watched as Gabriel pulled Castiel’s t-shirt up over his head, revealing defined muscle that his bookish appearance hid far too well. The shirt was discarded and they sought out each other’s mouths like they were providing oxygen, their hands roamed and pushed at far too tight underwear, both men straining for each other, which just made it hotter to watch as moisture absorbed into the thin cloth of their boxers. He eased himself out of his boxers as Castiel’s hand slipped down the back of Gabriel’s boxers, when Gabriel’s hand pushed through the fly of Castiel’s, he felt breathless, biting his lip to keep quiet as he stroked his prick. He spread his legs a little, knee knocking against a long thigh, he spared a glance at it, following the lanky but muscular limb up to bunched flannel, tearing his eyes away as he felt a shameful spike of arousal. A soft moan broke from the younger man at his side, the youngest of their housemates, being three years younger than Castiel, and Dean couldn’t help himself this time, sliding his gaze from the two men before them even as they pressed their dicks together and thrusted into Gabriel’s fist, following that same thigh past the flannel of hastily shoved down boxers. His breath hitched as he saw his prick, he’d caught glimpses of it before, trying not to watch as it pumped into Gabriel’s tight asshole, trying to focus on Gabriel’s mouth on his dick, Castiel’s dick in his ass, trying to lure Castiel into a kiss so he didn’t have to _see_ the man ahead of him.

He didn’t mean to turn his head, watching as a hand larger than his own stroked a dick _larger than his own_ , stroking himself faster, eyes dragging up, following the trail of hair up the eighteen year old’s body, fuck he didn’t even _notice_ he had that crest of sparse hair on his chest, he felt naked in comparison, but horny as hell, and then _he_ let out another moan, Dean’s gaze shifting to his face, the face he’d grown up seeing every day, fuck what was he even doing? Why the _hell_ had he started moving?

Before he even knew what he was doing, Dean had shifted so he was leaning on the side of his thigh, hand releasing his dick in favour of brushing through his hair and luring the teen into a kiss, tentative and sweet, their lips lingering a breath apart as hazel eyes widened in slight alarm,

“ _Dean?”_ it was barely a whisper, an unsure noise against Dean’s lips, and Dean was lost immediately,

“Just go with it…” he’d meant to apologise, to sit back and never do that again, but the teenager nodded, lips curling into a coy smile before he pushed closer and kissed Dean.

There was one rule in this _thing_ , _one rule_ , ‘don’t cross the streams’, everything would be ruined if they did, and the man next to him, beneath him? When did he end up on his lap? He was the youngest member of their household, a no-look zone for Dean, can’t look, can’t touch, but not because of his age, hell he was _Gabriel’s boyfriend_ and Gabriel was two years older than _Dean_ , he couldn’t look because it was _Sam_ , his _brother_ , and now he was kissing him, straddling him and running his hands over his muscular chest. He felt inadequate before he felt ashamed, worrying about what Sam thought of the soft spots he was digging his fingers into, of the slightly smaller prick pressing against his own. And then came the ‘shit he’s my brother’, the blind panic wondering why he wasn’t fleeing their house and driving across the country to get away from this complete fuck up. Sam’s hand found their dicks and Dean stopped thinking, he broke their kiss and pressed his head against Sam’s shoulder, panting hard as he fucked into Sam’s hand, their dicks rubbing together, slicking each other up and allowing for such fucking _intense_ friction. “S-Sammy..” he gasped out, licking and mouthing at the muscle leading to Sam’s neck, his fingers curling against the oddly soft hair on Sam’s chest; it suddenly felt like it was just him and Sam, all he could hear was their breaths, the sound of skin on skin, the litany of words Sam was whimpering into his shoulder, but Dean couldn’t focus on for long enough to make out much more than a few words, the word ‘scared’ standing out the most. “Shh,” he hushed against Sam’s neck, “shh it’s okay,” it’s not okay, it is definitely not okay, “it’s okay,” it became a mantra, panting against Sam’s neck, part of his mind screaming for him to stop, to stop saying it was okay because _Jesus Christ_ it _wasn’t_. He felt that telltale warmth in his gut, could feel Sam’s movements becoming slightly erratic like his own and shit this was a whole new level for them, sure, he’d come at the same time as Sam before, when they were fucking one of their boyfriends, or jerking off to them like they had intended to today, but this? This was so bizarre and taboo, he was biting into _his brother’s_ shoulder, streaking hot cum over _his brother’s_ stomach and chest and hand and _dick_ and god it was so _wrong_ to hear Sammy, _his_ Sammy crying out _his_ name as he added to the hot mess coating his front. So wrong but fuck hearing his name like that from Sam’s mouth felt amazing, at least until he heard a soft ‘holy shit…’ from behind them. He practically _fell_ off of Sam’s lap in his haste to get away, hell he _did_ fall, ending up on his ass on the rug between the trio of couches they’d crammed into their livingroom. He staggered to his feet, looking stricken as he backed away from Sam, the teen all puppy dog concern and worry, leaning forwards slightly, clearly wanting to pursue Dean.

“Oh god… oh god no…” Dean let out, covering his face with his hands, peering through his fingers at his teenage brother, feeling overwhelmed by shame and _shit_ he was still standing there with his dick out. “no no no,” he repeated, shaking his head and pulling his shorts up his hips, bolting from the room, Castiel calling out after him.

He fled to the back end of the house, slamming the door to his room behind him and dropping onto his bed, burying his face in his hands and berating himself, a knock sounded on the door and he waited,

“Dean? It’s Castiel, I’m coming in,” Castiel he could face, he needed him right now, needed to pull him close and apologise for being so disgusting, so revolting, for fucking around with _his kid brother_ , shit, he’d practically _raised_ that kid, and now he’d laid a hand on him, corrupted him (Gabriel’s corruptions didn’t have a scratch on what Dean had done).

“Cas help me,” he didn’t know when the first tear fell, but his hands were wet and he was starting to shut down and push this whole mess aside as Castiel pulled him into his arms and stroked his hair tenderly.

“It’s okay Dean, you’re okay…” he whispered, soothing him as best he could, “I’ve got you,” he murmured,

“I’m sick…” Dean growled against Castiel’s bare shoulder, and fuck he could still taste Sam’s skin, soapy yet oddly earthy sweat-slick skin, he shuddered at the thought. “I can’t… we’ve gotta end it, it was stupid… _I_ was stupid, thinkin’ we could keep it separate, fuck Cas what did I do?” his voice cracked a little as he sat back and looked up at Castiel, the slightly younger man stood before him, hands resting now on Dean’s shoulders.

“It… Dean I think you’re being a bit rash about this…” Castiel explained, looking uncomfortable, “it’s a natural progression of our relationship, you couldn’t have thought things would _stay_ how they were, after all the time we spent figuring out if we _wanted_ to combine our relationships?” Dean gained a sheepish hint to his look of shame, he had thought he could manage it, Sam was his _brother_ , why in the hell would he even _consider_ the possibility of becoming attracted to him? So he hadn’t thought about it, he figured things would stay as they’d been for the past few months, Sam and Dean would stay separate, but everything else was fair game, but… fuck…

“Have… shit have you been _waiting_ for me to get all fucking… fucking _incestuous?_ ” he balked, horrified by the idea that Castiel _welcomed_ this,

“I… I thought perhaps you needed some time..?” he sounded unsure of himself, slightly disbelieving that Dean hadn’t even contemplated this outcome,

“Time? Cas I don’t need _time_ , I need _out_ ,” he hissed, Castiel frowning at him, “out of this _thing_ ,” he gestured towards the door with one hand, “out of this house,”

“You want to move out?” Castiel frowned,

“Yes, preferably out of this _state_ ,” Dean was frustrated and scared, trying to fathom the extent of this exponential fuck up, “God Cas, I’ll never be able to look at him again… not after what I did…” he was pulled into another embrace, Castiel bending to hold him close,

“Dean I… I feel that given the circumstances… you did nothing wrong…” Castiel tried to reassure,

“I committed _incest_ ,” Dean groaned, the thought made him feel sick, but his mind wandered to Sam, all flushed skin, breathless and concerned, not at all phased by their act, just worried about Dean’s reaction to it. “Sam… he…” he couldn’t get it out, couldn’t vocalise the idea that Sam _welcomed_ his advance,

“Sam wanted this, Dean,” Castiel said, moving now to sit beside Dean on the bed, holding his hands gently,

“ _What_?” Dean had thought it himself, but hearing it didn’t feel right, he didn’t want to hear that Sam _wanted_ to be in… in an _incestuous_ relationship with him, he shuddered slightly and Castiel touched his cheek.

“I suppose Gabriel and I should have listened to him…” Castiel laughed softly, looking up through his lashes at Dean, “Sam didn’t believe you’d thought this through, accounted for the future prospect of him becoming your lover,” Dean gagged at the term lover, he didn’t need to think about his brother like that, hell right now he didn’t need to think about Sam at all, let alone a Sam who _wanted_ to have sex with him. “I assured him you had, you wouldn’t have agreed to this otherwise… Dean I am so sorry, I had no idea this would be a shock to you,” he apologised, “I thought you would come around to it in your own time, make your advance when you were ready,”

“I can’t Cas… I can’t do this if he’s a part of it, I can’t risk that, he’s my little brother, _Sammy_ , I taught him how to walk, how to talk, how to defend himself…” he trailed off, he had taught Sam a lot of things, raised him, chased away the monsters from his room when he was scared, cuddled up in bed with him when he still couldn’t sleep even with salt lining the doors and windows of his room, taught him how to talk to girls, told him it was okay if he would rather use that advice towards guys. “Fuck, what if it’s my fault?” he asked, “What if I did something wrong… made him think this would be okay?” he was begging Castiel to tell him he’d done nothing of the sort, but at the same time he didn’t want to think that something else had made Sam think this was a good idea.

“It’s not your fault, besides, nothing is wrong, this is just how things _are_ Dean, I understand that right now, thinking this, you do not want to further our relationship with them, but please don’t be so hasty to disregard everything we’ve built together,” he pleaded, “I’ll talk to them, we can slow things down, we don’t have to do anything, just give you time to think, to consider it and to maybe accept it, maybe not, it’s your choice, but at least think about it, for me, Gabriel, and Sam,”

“Cas I just… he’s my _brother_ okay? It’s not like you and Gabe,” Dean sighed, he couldn’t believe he was even _trying_ to comprehend this, and fuck for the first time in his life he was _glad_ his parents were gone, he couldn’t deal with being the one to push them over the edge, or to see that look of sheer horror and disappointment on their faces when he revealed that he maybe sort of accidentally fooled around with his little brother... and _liked_ it…

“I understand, but _please_ , just think about it,” Dean didn’t understand why Castiel wanted him to think about this, why he wanted him to consider having an incestuous relationship with his brother. He wondered if it was some way of making them even, because Gabriel was Castiel’s step-brother, had been since they were children, and Dean had hounded them into making out when they were all a little drunk, except Sam of course. But that didn’t make sense, because it was Gabriel who brought it up, completely sober, whilst they were crammed onto one of the sofas watching horror movies, he’d asked if he and Castiel could hook up, had invited Sam and Dean to watch, and Castiel had shrugged that he didn’t mind, but insisted that Sam and Dean make the decision… shit… Castiel had been _giving them time_ , he hadn’t been kidding; he really thought Dean had considered that this would happen, had accepted it and would make his move when he and Sam were ready to cross that considerably illegal bridge.

He felt stupid, ashamed and guilty and fucking _stupid_ , he just wanted to hide in his room and break down completely, considered asking Castiel to leave so he could, but instead he pushed Castiel further onto the bed, pushed up against his front and clung to him, burying his face in Castiel’s shoulder and heaving a huge sigh. Castiel was nothing but supportive, running his fingers through Dean’s hair, holding him close, his other hand typing furiously into his iPhone, trying to update Gabriel with what had happened and to make sure the two left them alone for the time being. Dean saw his words, was staring blankly at the lit up scream as Castiel waited for a response, snorted derisively when Gabriel responded to the request for alone time in true Gabriel fashion, with a lewd comment and a winking emoticon.

 

They didn’t actually leave Dean’s room that night, Castiel making his leave in the early hours of the morning to get himself ready for work at the café on his University’s campus, Dean steeling himself several hours later, ready to act as if nothing had happened, a specialty of his. He left his room dressed, though headed for the bathroom to shower, stripping off and leaving his stuff on the hamper before turning on the spray, waiting for the water to heat up then stepping in and drawing the curtain across.

He was mid shower when the door opened and someone came in, locking it behind them, he hoped to hell they’d just ignore him and leave him to his business, he definitely couldn’t cope with being naked in a room with Sam so soon after what had happened.

“So, who’s behind curtain number one?” Oh thank God, it was Gabriel, he peeked out of the shower to see the older male sat on the toilet with a magazine,

“Jesus Gabe, seriously? There’s a toilet outside,” he grimaced,

“I heard the shower running, wanted to keep you company,” Gabriel beamed,

“Yeah well it’s fucking inappropriate so do your business and get out,” he huffed, trying not to feel guilty when Gabriel’s casually giddy mood vanished,

“Wow, Cassie wasn’t kidding…” he sighed as he opened up his magazine. Dean wanted to ask, but by the time he’d got up the courage to try, Gabriel had fled the bathroom and he was stood in the middle of the shower _not_ cleaning himself. He was quick after that, drying and dressing and heading through the house, making a beeline for the kitchen until he saw Sam’s back, the teen was dressed and had a bag slung over one shoulder and was waiting for his toast to pop up so he could snag it and leave the house. Dean checked his watch, he was running later than Sam was, and he couldn’t bring himself to go into the kitchen now he saw the company he’d be keeping, feeling guilty and shameful before he grabbed his bag from beneath the coat rack, his keys from the pot on the hall table, then headed out the door, just about hearing his name being called questioningly. He sped up, rushing to his car and dropping into his seat, trying to calm himself down before he ignited the engine, a mistake on his part as the passenger door opened and Sam dropped in, full slice of toast hanging out of his mouth, smeared with butter, butter that Dean noticed had given Sam’s lips a slight sheen, more noticeable when Sam pulled the slice from his mouth.

“I’m running late, can you drop me off?” he asked, tongue darting out to wipe the crumb laden moisture from his lip before taking another bite of the toast,

“Uh… s-sure…” Dean coughed after he’d spoken, trying to get a grip of himself as he started the engine and pulled out from the kerb outside their house.

The drive was painfully awkward, quiet enough to hear a pin drop, or in this case to hear the Lego rattling in the heater, he kept glancing at Sam though, swallowing thickly every time, and either Sam misinterpreted him, or was just trying to help him cope,

“Here,” he said as they pulled up at some lights, drawing Dean’s attention from the road now that they’d stopped for a moment. When Dean looked, Sam was holding out half of his slice, Dean staring intently at the semi-circular bite marks in the bread for a long while before he reached out and took it, hyper-aware of when their fingers touched, and how Sam’s felt slightly buttery, managing to distract himself before Sam licked the residue off. He kept up the odd little charade, biting the corner of the now pretty cold, pretty soggy slice of toast and holding it there as the lights changed, eating it soon after. He pulled up half a block from Sam’s school, hell it was Stanford but he still called it a school, still treating Sam like a baby, up until that _encounter_ , he grimaced and shook his head, glancing through the corner of his eye to see Sam watching him sadly, wanting to say something, probably to have a heart-to-heart, but instead, he uttered a quiet thanks and left the car, leaving Dean to double back and head for work.

He couldn’t concentrate at all, ended up being stuck on the front desk doodling on a notepad with the auto-shop’s logo watermarked on every page, barely paying attention as he scratched a biro blue drawing into the cheap paper. He was about half way through his shift when he heard heels clicking on the tile of the reception building, smiling when he saw a woman approaching,

“Hi there,” he greeted, trying to look as charming as possible,

“hello, I’m picking up my car,” she sounded British to Dean, “Bela Talbot, I’ve already paid,” she introduced after a moment, holding out a receipt for Dean, who took it and looked it over, heading to find out if the other mechanic was done with it and if there were any added costs. When he returned, Bela was looking over the pad with interest, “did you draw this?” she asked, holding it up, revealing Dean’s absent minded doodle to be a little more detailed than he remembered. He nodded and was about to instruct her to follow him through when she continued, “You’re really good,” she noted, “did you go to school for this?” he shrugged at that,

“I used to go to CalArts, my boyfriend still goes there,” he answered, “anyways—“

“Is this him?” he looked to the doodle, realising it _was_ a portrait of one of his housemates, it wasn’t Castiel, hell it wasn’t even _Gabriel_ , it was Sam, pulling that kicked puppy face of his, the one Dean had caught a glimpse of before he’d gotten out of the car.

“…no…” he answered slowly, “if you’ll follow me, I’ll pull your car out,” he instructed,

“So you used to go to Cal Arts?” she asked, “When did you graduate?”

“I dropped out over a year ago,” he answered frostily, he didn’t really want to talk about it, and she was still holding the picture of Sam,

“Oh that’s a shame, why?” he didn’t answer, instead he led her just outside the garage and headed in to pull her car out, getting out and gesturing to the car for her,

“Enjoy your day,” he said with a forced smile, taking his notepad back and heading inside quickly. He was doubly miserable from then onwards, definitely not looking forward to the few hours he’d have to put in at the club once he was done here, sick of working his life away to pay for half a degree, his share on a house, and the extra bit Sam’s grants couldn’t cover for his own learning. He was curt and to the point for the last few hours of his shift, clocking out and driving home, having a hasty bowl of instant noodles over the sink so he could change his clothes and head for his next job.

“Hey Dean,” his shoulders stiffened and he turned, holding his bowl at collar height, the fork a little higher, trying to redirect any falling noodles back into the bowl as he slurped his mouthful, watching Sam with wide eyes. “I uh… are we gonna talk about this?”

“Nothing to talk about,” he muttered, dumping the last half of his noodles into the waste disposal, clicking the switch and placing the bowl on the side, “Gotta get ready for work, bye,” he sidled past Sam, hands up defensively so no touching would occur, and headed for his bedroom at the back of the house, pulling his t-shirt over his head,

“Dean come on, we’ve _got_ to talk about this,” Sam pleaded, had followed him.

“Jesus Christ Sam get out!” he squawked, shoving Sam quickly and slamming the door, acting like he’d just been caught naked, and not just shirtless, but hell he didn’t need Sam here whilst he was getting changed, not after what had happened,

“Seriously? _Now_ it’s weird for me to see you shirtless?” Sam called through the door, “and by the way, I’m fine, I only collided with the freaking wall,”

“Shut up Sam,” Dean called out, cringing as his voice cracked. He let out a shaky exhale before fishing in his wardrobe for the tight fitted black v-neck his ‘uniform’ consisted of, the bright red ‘it’s my job to ask’ button and his name tag attached to the breast of it. He pulled it on and changed into his work trousers, ignoring the fact that he _knew_ Sam was stood outside his room waiting.

“Dean,”

“I thought Cas told you guys to drop it,” he snapped as he yanked the door open, Sam giving him that stupid puppy look, and Dean tried to push aside the image of Sam looking at him like that when tied up, aching cock stood out proud from his body, desperate for release.

“Well Cas and Gabe aren’t here,” he huffed matter-of-factly, puffing his chest out and standing just that bit taller than Dean, and Dean noticed the way Sam took in his tight shirt and pants, realised he’d seen Sam do the same thing before.

“Seriously, how long have you known me Sam? I’m _not_ talking about this,” he grunted, pushing past Sam a little more carefully this time, wincing as his fingers trailed over the hard muscle of Sam’s chest, hating his traitorous body. He heard Sam start to call his name, “Nothing to talk about, not talking!” he shouted, heading to the kitchen to grab his bag before heading out. He could walk to the club, it was easier that way anyway, plus it wasn’t far at all, he was going to end up there early, but they wouldn’t mind him clocking in and getting to work. They didn’t mind, hell they avoided him and his stormy mood, but it didn’t take long for him to start chatting to people as they ordered drinks from him, smiling and ‘looking pretty’ whilst he served, practiced in both flowery colourful drinks and pulling a mean pint.

 

Avoiding Sam for a prolonged period of time wasn’t easy at the best of times, not the least when Spring Break began three weeks into Dean’s avoidance, he took more shifts at both of his jobs and managed to guilt a friend to hire him for the delivery shift at their store. He was tiring himself out and everyone was worried about him, this time waiting for him when he staggered in gone midnight from his latest shift at the club, head throbbing with residual drum and bass. He made to bypass the lounge entirely but Castiel was there to hook an arm around him and manhandle him _far too easily_ into the room with Sam and Gabriel, the two sat looking concerned as Dean was plonked on a couch on his own, trying to fall onto his side and pass out as quickly as possible, but Castiel rethought his decision to sit Dean on his own and sat beside him, rousing him into alertness with a smack around the back of the head.

“Ow! What the hell Cas!” he cried out, clutching his aching head and cowering away from his boyfriend,

“We need you awake for this Dean,”

“What is this? An intervention? I think you should wait til I start fucking my family before you give me a fucking intervention,” he grumbled irritably, squinting at them as his head pounded,

“here,” a glass and aspirin were held out for him a moment later, “I’m sorry for that but you were trying to avoid things again,” Castiel sighed,

“M’not avoiding anything…” he huffed,

“You’re avoiding _me_ ,” Sam let out with a slight disgruntled squeak to his voice, looking sheepish when Gabriel gave him a look.

“Dean… After what happened, we get that you’re having issues with coping, but you can’t just ignore it,”

“Yeah Dean-o, it’s not gonna go away because you’re pretending it’s not there, you gotta air this stuff out,” Gabriel aided, “we tried to give you space, some of us more than others,” he gave Sam another look and Sam looked a tad guilty, “but clearly that’s just making you more withdrawn, we’re worried about you, we want this all sorted out so we can get on with our lives,” he explained, Dean shifting uncomfortably. They wanted some kind of answer from him, he just knew it, they wanted to know if he was willing to condemn himself to whatever hell lay beyond death by fucking his little brother.

“I can’t do it, I am not gonna commit incest with my _kid brother_ ,”

“I’m not a kid Dean!” Sam protested,

“I don’t care Sam! You’re still my brother, fucking you is _wrong_ and sick and I’m not gonna do it,” he couldn’t understand why Sam was having such a hard time accepting that he didn’t want to _have sex with his brother_. “Why are you so on board with this? It’s fucking insane! Not to mention gross, what would mom and dad think?” Sam cowed at that,

“They’re dead Dean, they don’t care,” he muttered, “besides it’s not like anyone here even knows we’re brothers,” he was referring to people outside of their household, because Sam was a Campbell, he had declared himself as such the minute he was old enough, got it changed legally and all, he didn’t want to be their dad’s kid, they never did get on.

“ _We_ know, Sam, _we_ know we’re doing something wrong, why doesn’t this seem _wrong_ to you?” he asked, eyes pleading. Castiel and Gabriel were quiet, watching the exchange nervously, waiting for the spark that would ignite hell on earth for their household, Gabriel reached out when Sam got up suddenly, ready to stop him, but Sam gave him a pleading look and for some reason he let it slide, watched as Sam approached Dean and grabbed his face, actually _grabbed_ him, fingers digging into his jaw and cheeks,

“ _Because_. _this. isn’t. wrong._ ” He ground out, “it isn’t,” he said again, searching Dean’s tired eyes. “Dean I love you,” it wasn’t supposed to be said that way, not between brothers, it made him shift uncomfortably but Sam wouldn’t let him look away, “and I know you love me, and hell we have a serious co-dependency issue here, it’s not even that much of a stretch,”

“Sam I practically _raised_ you…” Dean protested weakly, he didn’t like this at all, seeing all that fucking emotion in Sam’s damned puppy eyes, he wanted to soothe it away, wanted to give Sam everything he wanted, and that scared him. He didn’t want to do this out of some ill-conceived need to _support_ and do everything to make his brother happy… hell he didn’t want to do this _at all_ … did he?

“I know Dean… and God I love you more for that…” his grip on Dean’s jaw loosened and he started stroking the slightly red skin soothingly, brushing his thumb over the crease in Dean’s brow until it felt weird enough for Dean to try and relax the muscles, to stop his brows from being pulled up into a pitiful look. “I want this Dean; I want _you_ , more than you’re giving me, and if you really, honestly don’t want that… I understand… but you’re repeating the same excuses like you’re trying to convince _yourself_ ,” he was whispering now, trailing his thumb down Dean’s face and moving to catch it on his bottom lip, “tell me you honestly don’t want this…” his thumb moved and he replaced it with his mouth, pressing a kiss to Dean’s lips, the same tentative request he’d offered his brother way back when, and fuck Dean realised he’d gone without sex the whole time. A voice in his head told him to blame that for his actions, for the way he curled his fingers into Sam’s shirt and pulled him closer, leaning back and dragging Sam onto his lap, the way his hands redirected to pulling the offensive piece of clothing off, offensive because it _existed_ where it shouldn’t. He was surprised to bump hands with Gabriel, he felt the rings, knew it was him helping Sam out of his clothes, helping guide Dean’s hands over Sam’s body, like he needed the help, or maybe just the encouragement because every so often he would hesitate, and Gabriel would be there hedging him on, whilst Castiel watched? Sat awkwardly? Dean didn’t know _what_ Castiel was doing, but he wasn’t touching anyone and _that_ was a problem.

“Mh… Cas…” he muttered against Sam’s lips, trying to ease away but Sam was giving him a hard time of it, not wanting to relinquish his grasp on something he’d tried so hard to obtain in the first place, “Fuh… Sammy quit it,” he grumbled, pressing his fingers between their mouths and looking for Castiel, “ever the fucking optimist,” he smirked tiredly, eyes widening when a tongue swirled around his fingers, a hot mouth soon taking them in and sucking. Castiel was unfolding one of their couches into a bed, which explained why Gabriel was pressed flush to Sam’s back, aside from him trying to unthread Sam’s belt with one hand whilst he unbuttoned his pants with the other. Castiel stopped for a moment, shrugging and tucking the loose sheets in, the bed looking like a stage between the other two couches, which was something it had acted as before. Dean was distracted though, watching as Sam lavished his fingers like he would a cock, he swallowed thickly, not realising how _hard_ he was, and Sam was the only one paying him any attention. Sam, his brother, his brother Sam, the Sam who seemed to notice what he was thinking and smirked around his fingers,

“Gonne fuck you with these fingers…” he whispered before kissing the wet digits, treating them like something precious as Gabriel moved from behind him and they both helped guide Dean the two feet of floor space to the bed, lying him back on it and helping him out of his work clothes, not that the thin material really left much to the imagination. Castiel was on the bed by his head, kneeling so he could lean over Dean and touch Sam with ease, or curl over Dean and kiss him, upside down and awkward, but it was something Dean found an odd enjoyment in. For the moment though, he was stroking Dean’s hair, soothing him gently whilst Sam settled between his legs, Gabriel to his side, waiting for things to get going before he decided exactly where he wanted to be, and one more person providing Dean some emotional support.

“Shit guys I’m not giving birth here, stop coddling, start fucking,” Dean grumbled, because it sure as hell felt like he was in a hospital bed surrounded by friends and family, admittedly very naked friends and family, but they were there all the same, and Sam found some amusement in lifting Dean’s legs like he was in hospital stirrups, poking fun before he took Dean’s hand to get on with the better poking. Sam wet Dean’s fingers more with saliva, but Castiel had lube on hand, ever the fucking Boy Scout (though he would argue he was an Eagle Scout), saliva would do for what Sam intended though, pressing Dean’s fingers to his taint, stroking the soft skin and wetting it, admiring the view he had of his older brother,

“You are so beautiful,” Sam uttered,

“fag,” Dean grumbled, gasping when his own fingers were pushed against his hole, not hard enough to be painful, it made his dick twitch though, which gave Sam the response he wanted to give without saying anything, merely raising an eyebrow and looking sassy.

He soon accepted the tube of lube from Castiel, squirting it onto Dean’s fingers and pressing the cool gel immediately to Dean’s asshole, making him gasp and arch off of the bed in surprise, panting and trying to catch his breath as Sam prepared him with his own fingers, uttering encouragement the whole while, guiding him through it and stopping him when he shuddered in pleasure, finding his own personal ‘g-spot’. Sam soon replaced Dean’s fingers with his own and Castiel had leant down to kiss Dean, to distract him as Sam stretched him further, got him ready for his fucking _prick_ , nigh on huge, Dean never thought he’d be ready, but he’d experimented, had taken Castiel and a majorly intimidating girl’s strap on at once, he could take Sam, since his issue with Sam was length, not girth. It was terrifying either way, they were so close to taboo it was nauseating, but it didn’t feel like a bad kind of nauseating, it was like his first time all over again, a new, slightly awkward experience because _Sam’s_ confidence was waning as Dean fell apart beneath him, as Gabriel helped slide a condom over his dick and whispered reassuringly in his ear. Sam smiled down at Dean and all he could think when he saw that look was ‘fuck, you’re cute’, he’d said it too, given the way Sam lost his nerve and began blushing, letting Dean’s legs drop to his sides as he eased himself over him, far enough that as Castiel began kissing Dean again, he wasn’t obstructing them. He was leaning on both hands, which meant Gabriel was thrilled to be “guiding Sammy home”, wrapping a hand around Sam’s dick and easing the head against Dean’s slightly aching asshole, Castiel did a good job of distracting Dean, though he still tensed up when Sam pushed in, it wasn’t long before he eased off though, and Sam pushed in further, so thick and long and fuck Dean felt too full, barely a few inches in and Sam felt like an overwhelming presence.

“Dean?” he asked hesitantly, Dean nipping at Castiel’s lips before letting the man sit up, he looked to Sam, chest heaving and eyes glazed with lust, taking in Sam’s broad shoulders and muscular body, wondering where the hell Sam found time to go to the gym,

“Fuck me…” was all he managed when he tried to ask, a request as it turned out, Sam looking relieved and drawing back before pushing in again, staying at half his length whilst Dean adjusted to him. Although Dean felt pleasure, he wasn’t as hard anymore, nervous and apprehensive as more of Sam’s prick pushed into him, it was uncomfortable but he knew it would ease off, and he knew his dick needed some attention, reaching sluggishly to Gabriel, luring the man in to his face and kissing him lightly, “need you…” he murmured against Gabriel’s mouth,

“I’m listening…” Gabriel smirked, licking at Dean’s mouth,

“cock..” was all Dean managed before he was arching of the bed with a gasp, coming close to headbutting Gabriel as Sam rubbed at his sensitive spot. Gabriel didn’t waste any time, taking Dean’s dick into his mouth and sucking it, lavishing it with tongue and suction, pumping the base as he did so. He wanted Castiel too, had begun begging him and pleading with him but his words were such a jumbled litany that he didn’t know what he was asking for until Castiel moved.

The younger man hovered over Dean as he shifted down the bed, Dean pegging on quickly and moving his arms, resting them on Castiel’s calves and holding his thighs as he eased Castiel back and licked a stripe from balls to asshole, paying more attention to Castiel’s tight pucker than anything, thrilled to be tasting the soapy musk of his slightly OCD lover. Dean lost the feel of Gabriel’s mouth on him but felt Castiel’s asshole tighten erratically around his tongue, meaning Gabriel was alternating, Sam was fucking Dean slowly whilst he licked his way into Castiel’s mouth, and Dean was eating Castiel’s ass greedily.

It felt fucking amazing, but confusing as hell, two points of sexual stimulation were intense, two points and Castiel’s taste in his mouth were beyond him, and the thought of the four of them fucking outright made Dean jerk his hips as best he could, inhaling deeply through his nose, taking in all the scent Castiel had to offer, Castiel careful with the pressure of his kneeling. Dean wasn’t sure who came first, it was a chain reaction of fucking ecstasy, all he knew was Sam filled him, or would have were there not a barrier, and he came a few thrusts after, he didn’t know when Castiel’s hole had begun twitching around his tongue, but he vaguely recalled the aftershocks, and Gabriel was pretty fucking blissed out with his face and mouth dripping cum. Clean-up was being out of bed long enough to rip off the sheet and wipe everyone down before collapsing back onto the fold out, boneless and sated. Dean should have felt ashamed, should have remembered that this was wrong, that he’d just had his little brother’s not so little cock inside him, had just cum with Sam buried inside him, but he was content to pass out in between Castiel and Sam, Gabriel half way down his body, head on his stomach, he was just too fucking tired to care.


End file.
